What's in a name?

Before she was ever conceived, we knew our first daughter's name would be Faith. On the car ride home from my 27th birthday dinner, the subject of baby names came up. I told Rob that I had a name in mind if we had a girl. Instead of just blurting it out, I told him the reasoning behind my choice...

On  Aug. 27, 2008, I found out I was pregnant. It was probably the scariest thing that has ever happened to me. It was not a planned pregnancy. I had just been accepted to grad school and Rob was still taking classes to become a teacher. In short, the timing wasn't right. I remember crying a lot because we weren't ready for a baby, but in the minutes after I told Rob the news, I slowly began to change my mind. Here is an excerpt from a story I wrote about the experience...

"He sat down on the floor in his button down shirt and tie. I patted the couch and told him to come sit by me, but he shook his head. He was comfortable right where he was, tearing up because he was going to become a daddy. I cried and cried some more about not being ready and that this wasn’t the right time and Rob stayed a rock. He held me and said that this was a good thing, something to be happy about and that no one had died, except that plant, he added laughing and pointed at something I hadn’t watered in days that once resembled a flower. I smiled, thinking what the perfect thing to say that was. He followed it up by adding that though this wasn’t exactly our timeline, it was something that we planned to do, it was just sooner than we thought. He then told me that I was going to be a good mom, just like my mom, and that had to be my favorite thing he has ever said to me."

We quickly got used to the idea of being a mom and a dad, reading our baby books together on the couch one Friday night. But it wasn't long before our world-to-be came crashing down. I started spotting on a Wednesday and by that Friday I had a miscarriage. It was an awful, sad experience I wouldn't wish upon my worst enemy and I don't care to go into details here and now.

While the miscarriage was hell, the hardest thing about it is the next time you get pregnant. The possibility that something could go wrong consumes you. The worst part -- there's nothing you can do, except let time pass. And pray. And that's where my reasoning for the name Faith comes in. I knew it would take complete faith in God, myself and all things holy for me to be able to get through a pregnancy after such a heartwrenching experience. I knew that while I could eat everything nutritious and abide by the pregnancy books, that most of it would be out of my hands. Essentially, I knew I would need an immense amount of courage and strength, but mostly just faith to get through it without living each day in fear that I would miscarry again.

Back to the car on the night of my birthday. I had just basically recited what you read in the above paragraph to my husband before I revealed that the name I was thinking of naming our baby girl was, indeed, Faith. I thought I'd have to fight him on it since we disagreed about pretty much every other name we'd ever talked about, but I didn't. When I said the word Faith, tears welled in his eyes and he simply nodded. I was overcome with emotion. And that's how we decided what our baby girl's name should be...

To close up, Faith was baptized this past Sunday, and fittingly, the homily was all about faith. Father Dave made the point that the opposite of faith is not doubt, but fear, and I couldn't agree more. Too often, we are afraid of what might be or not be and it paralyzes us from moving forward. But if we have faith... in God, in ourselves and one another, we are able to accomplish amazing things. But it's not easy. In fact, it's quite difficult at times, especially when history and the past are not on our side. However, when we believe, when we let go of things we cannot control and most importantly, when we have faith, it leads to freedom.

So what's in a name you ask...everything.And a lot of Faith.

Here are a few more pics of the baptism...to see more, check out the album on Facebook.

Mom, Dad and baby

Godmothers Ramey and Rachel

Beautiful bracelet from her grandma Mac!

my beautiful, beautiful Faith~

The Times They Are a-Changin'

As the song title suggests, some changes are coming in the life of a Lindquist (actually, all three). First and foremost, I start school this week. This obviously means I won't be home as much. I am extremely lucky to have been around during the summer while the bump formerly known as Baby L (also see: Lucy, Lady Gaga, Lilly, Wilma, and Robette) transforms our lives. *Beware: the following is a series of series that might make you wish my comma key broke.* I've been privy to exploding diapers, monster burps/farts (mostly Faith's), wake-up calls, multiple clothes changes, baths, walks, and naps. But even more importantly, I've seen the little baby grow from "the baby" to Faith with smiles, winks, screaming fits mixed with giggles, coos, and belly time on my chest. It blows my mind that almost seven weeks ago she was still a blip on the radar. And now, I won't be around for every minute. This week Nicole takes over full time, with help only coming between the hours of 3ish p.m. to 6ish a.m.

I have it easy. I'm expected to change diapers and clean messes. I don't do nearly as much as Nicole - but I try to make it easier on her when I can. And now that's going to lessen. Even with the changes, I know I'll be able to come home to a wonderful family that expects me to be me. Howie knows I'll let him out and feed him. Nicole knows I'll help her and be the best husband/father I can. And eventually, Faith will know I will be there whenever she calls, for whatever reason, no matter what. This is winning the lottery.

So, to commemorate this upcoming change (not really, but it's a transition for the English teacher) I have decided to update the blog. We (Nicole and I) have been blogging primarily about Faith, so I found a more "baby friendly" theme. There are also a few tweaks here and there, but for the most part it's the same. I'm guessing most readers aren't looking at the exhaustive details anyway because of the in-depth writing. *insert cheesy-winky-smiley thing here*

Finally, this is my favorite picture of Faith so far. I'm sure that fact will change often; with the times (wow, that was corny).

~Rob

The bath from hell

In hindsight, I should have gone grocery shopping. I had the option between that and giving Faith a bath. She loves the water, especially having her hair washed, so I chose the latter and off to Hy-Vee went Rob.

Faith's bath started off as most baths do, getting the baby naked. As I was preparing to place her in her bath chair, she peed...all over her fully clothed mother. Better than peeing in the tub I guess. Not wanting to prolong things, I decided to strip off the bottom half of my clothes and hop in there with her. I wiped her face with a washcloth, got her 8.5 pound body wet and began soaking her hair.

Right in the middle of what can only be described as a glorious rendition of "Rubber Ducky," an explosion of immense proportions occurred. That's right, my cute lil, innocent-eyed daughter pooped. With me in the tub no less! While she was unfazed, I was traumatized. For anyone who has ever seen a breastmilk fed baby's diapers, you can empathize with me here. Ewwww.

After lots of omygods and babycakeshowcouldyous, I got the situation handled, and gave her bath number 2. The kicker: as I was putting on a fresh clean diaper, she peed on her changing pad...girl is hydrated!

Anyway, I thought I'd better note this milestone of sorts on the blog so I can remind her of it when she's in her teen years. And for anyone that's never thanked their mother for all the shit (pun intended) they put up with, please do so now. Cheerio!