That's What She Said - Gabby Edition

A compilation of the things Gabby has said that made us laugh out loud recently, in addition to her penchant for knock knock jokes, talking incessantly talking about her friend Decker, saying "I tooted," and making up stories about her imaginary friends PACA and CHACA.

(After taking her first bite of Chinese food)
"Ohhhhhhhhh, that was yum."

(We had taken off her shirt and pants after a milk spill at dinner. A few minutes later, while still sitting at the table...)
"The good news is I'm naked. The bad news is I have panties on."

(Gabby, after a 30 second coughing fit.)
"My goodness!"

(Rob and I have a tendency to present things as good news/bad news as you can see)
Gabby: "Wanna hear some sad news?"
Me: (Concerned) "What?"
Gabby: (Frowning) "I can't eat brownies."
Me: "Why not?"
Gabby: "Cause I have a canker sore."
(Faith had one the week before. Odd that they're apparently contagious.)

(Driving by some stores on the way home right before naptime, with a deliriously tired child)
Gabby: (eyes half open) "I only like stores with things in them."

Me: (Looking at her bandaged hand) "Gabby, does your finger still hurt?"
Gabby: (Stops what she's doing to look at her hand) "OUCH!!!!!"

(We were talking about "crushes" at dinner one night.)
Gabby: "What's a crush?"
Me: "It's when you like somebody."
Gabby: (thinks for a second) "I have a crush on mom."

Heart melted. Man I love that girl!

Dear Not-Pregnant Me

Dear Future Not-Pregnant Me,
I've seen you eying those baby bumps on other women. Romanticizing what it was like to be walking around with another life growing inside of you. Recalling with fondness those times you were expecting Faith, Gabs and Rob Jr. (not the actual name). Before you do anything drastic, allow currently pregnant you to offer you some advice. And future Rob, if you're reading this now, ruuuuuuun! Seriously, go lock yourself in a hotel room until future me finishes reading this letter. (Wow, this is getting all Matrix-y.)

Repeat after me: Pregnancy is HARD! Really really hard. A positive pregnancy test result is quickly followed by immediate worry for you. You tend to fret about everything and then some, going so far as to Google things like"in utero seizures." Once you've managed to calm the hell down, you typically turn your attention to Enemy #1: food.

The mere mention of meat makes your gag reflect activate. Bread and cheese seem to be your only two friends, hence why you gain close to 40 pounds each time. For the record, you once at a bagel with refried beans on it when pregnant, which proves knocked-up you cannot be trusted . Do the words "Flamin' Hot Cheetos" ring a bell? Even present you judges you for that.

Moving on from the nauseous phase, you start showing incredibly early. Which means maternity clothes come on at about 14 weeks. The same frocks you were excited to buy at Target in the beginning are still the same ones on the rack six months later. (Come on Bullseye, work with me here.) While that elastic band in most prego pants is nice to have on Thanksgiving, your jeans constantly slip, leaving you wondering if you might be able to pull off suspenders. The answer is no.

Remember the other day when you bent over to pick something up and didn't think anything of it? That is purely impossible when you're "with child." At not even 30 weeks, the act of dropping something on the floor angers you to the point of yelling out almost-obscenities like "SHIPS!" The former you may have told her husband not to bother even bringing in the newspaper if he was just going to throw it on the floor. This may have been said in a raised voice on the brink of tears, I can't remember.

Wine. Yeah, a little glass of red vino at the end of a long day sounds nice, doesn't it? Pregnant you can only stare a little too long at the Valentine bottle display and go home to water laced with a fiber supplement. And all those yummy craft beers Mr. Lindquist so rudely drinks in front of you during pregnancy? Yeah, you can go down one of those right now. And damn if they don't pair perfectly with sushi, another no no for preggies.

Girl Scout cookies - ha! You are borderline diabetic when pregnant. Watch those carbs and sugars girlfriend, which by the way, are in everything that tastes good. Don't worry though, you can still have all the veggies you need, but not too much fruit. Dairy is hard on your weak stomach, and meat proteins, well, you know how you feel about pork.

You ever watch hot dogs rotating around in a rotisserie? That's how you sleep when you're pregnant, except you don't go all the way around. You just toss and turn approximately 47 times a night. Surprisingly, you only get up to go to the bathroom about once a night. The worst is when you can't "go" if you know what I mean. And I think you still remember what that leads to...

Working out just isn't possible for you when you're pregnant. This being the 3rd go round, your bones, joints and muscles south of the border ain't what they used to be. Other than yoga, you're limited to walking and it's usually cold out when you're pregnant. If you can go for a run right now, do it. Just try not to pass by anyone with a jogging stroller.

You have three awesome kiddos, and the truth is this body of ours has done its fair share. Hopefully by now your boobs are your own again, you're back to your pre-pregnancy weight (whatever that means) and you're sleeping through the night. Why ruin a good thing, girl?

Oh. I know why. Those baby kicks are the absolute best. His movements in the middle of an important meeting remind me that I'm never alone. All that deprivation and stress fade to the background when he gets the hiccups. Before I know it, he'll be here, and I'll miss this part immensely - the adorable way my belly looked like a basketball in my clothes, the way I'm eating as much as you want and how I don't even care, how I park in the expectant mother spot anywhere I go, the smiles from strangers, the leeway from my husband to be lazy, it's what we remember long after the other things are distant memories.

So, future me, know that while it was hard and sometimes I envied you, I did appreciate this opportunity to the fullest. I'm grateful to have this experience for the last time. You really don't need to come back and do it again. So go sleep on your stomach, drink wine at will and when you walk by the maternity section at Target, smile when you see it's still the same clothes they had back in 2017.

Much love,
34-year-old pregnant you

Oh Boy!

It's Jan 2. I'm almost 24 weeks pregnant. And this is the first blog post about our baby boy. Say it with me now: third child syndrome.  Let's start at the beginning. And since Mr. Lindquist Jr. is due April 25, we'll go with the tried and true list of 25 things (24 for Faith since she was born on the 24th; 23 for Gabby since she was born on the 23rd).

1) Yes, this was a planned pregnancy. Not sure why I feel the need to share that, but people keep asking like we're not sure how this works. No, we weren't trying/hoping for a boy. A left-handed child, maybe.

2) We found out in mid-August. I told Rob with a message on the mirror written in blue marker similar to what he left for us when he went on an out of town trip a few weeks before. When he saw it, he came out looking surprised. (Not sure why; he should know how this works by now ;) We smiled at each other and hugged in silence since the girls were standing right there.

3) I felt horrible from weeks 7-14. While it was comforting to have morning sickness, I was grossed out by the mere mention of certain foods (pork meatloaf still activates my gag reflex). Chewing three different types of gum helped get the bad taste out of my mouth most days but I've never been so happy to see the 2nd trimester.

4) My clothes shrunk. OK, so I started showing earlier than normal. Of course I didn't take any pictures because this is the third baby.

5) We had our first ultrasound on Tuesday, Sept. 27th. It was an excruciating wait til the 10 week mark. The minute baby popped up on the ultrasound, we saw the flashing light of a heartbeat and relief washed over me. That happiness is unmatched by anything I've ever felt other than the other two times I've seen it.

6) The next day I headed out of town to Detroit. Rob joined me there a few days later and we experienced the city the best we could for a girl who didn't feel like eating and couldn't drink, not to mention was incredibly tired. He was a trooper and I am grateful he was by my side.

7) I had/have major fertility guilt. So many women I know have struggled to conceive or had multiple miscarriages. Having experienced one of my own, I am familiar with how it feels to watch everyone but you walking around with a baby belly. It's something I will never take for granted, but I still wanted to celebrate each milestone of this pregnancy, knowing it is highly likely it's my last.

8) So we took fun pictures to announce we were expecting baby number three. The girls weren't very cooperative for the photoshoot, but we got the shot we needed. Rob's shirt says "I am the father." With the light sabers for added effect, it was Star Wars nerdom in full force, pun intended.

9) We finally told the girls at about 12 weeks. Their reactions were priceless. I can't wait to show baby brother this video when's he older.

10) Faith kept the secret for about 5 minutes. She asked if she could tell her friends at school and I said no, to wait a week or so. That Saturday at her soccer game, all the other moms started congratulating me. I wasn't too upset since it just made me realize how excited she was to share the good news.

11) This may sound silly, but making the announcement Facebook official was so rewarding. After keeping it to ourselves for so long, it was amazing to see the outpouring of support from our friends and family. I'll never underestimate how encouraging others can be in good times.

12) About 18 ish weeks in I started feeling flutters. Faith made me wait until 24 weeks and I think Gabs gave me a break and started moving around at about 14-16 weeks. These movements are indescribable and help with pregnant lady anxiety.

13) Yes, anxiety. While I would love a care-free pregnancy, that is out of the questions after losing one at 7 weeks and hearing all of the stories of women who've experienced a loss at some point along the way. The one thing that has helped me through it is prayer and faith in God. As much as I would love to be in control, the truth is I'm not. He is.

14) Another thing I'm not in control of is my appetite. Since getting over the nausea, I have become a voracious eater. Second helpings are my jam. Oh, jam sounds good. On Thanksgiving, I got a few side glances at the portion of sweet potato casserole I placed on my plate, but there's no shame in my game. Like I said, a last hurrah will do that to ya!

15) We thought for sure it was a girl. Our doc even said the chances for an XX were higher because we already had two little ladies. Since my first and second pregnancy were so different and they were both girls, I didn't know what to think. As time went on, I became more and more sure it was a chica in there.

16) So much for that idea. Our ultrasound on the 6th of December revealed "it's a boy." After the sonographer did such a good job of not using the pronoun he, a tech that had been there one week wanted to do some practice while the OB reviewed the photos. She kept saying "his" so we had an inkling, but weren't sure until we looked at photo ourselves.

17) I may have said the words, "Is it really?" about 40 times when we found out. Mentally, I was ready for a girl. I thought we'd get the news and then keep on keeping on til the baby was born because this was old hat for us. We had the clothes, every pink toy imaginable and even a "Welcome Baby Girl" sign for the door. The boy was the left turn I didn't know we were taking but I am so so ready for this road and the journey that comes with it.

18) Everyone asks if Rob is excited. Of course he is, but I truly haven't noticed that it's any more so than when we found out with the girls. I think he will have a special bond with baby boy just like I do with the girls, (we just get each other sometimes) but a kid is a kid. You love em just the same no matter what.

19) But the girls wanted another girl. Mainly to add another party to our "girls' nights" when dad has to work, etc. I was worried they would create an America's Funniest Videos-style meltdown when we told them, but they were excited. Gabby said "I love boys" and Faith just couldn't wait to spill the beans to her friends.

20) I am finally processing what it means to be having a son. While I have no idea of the reality, I am looking forward to it now. And I've realized that I've been a bit too "pro girl" in the past only thinking of the scarier parts of raising a boy: the rambunctiousness, the peeing everywhere, and worst of all, liking girls. I've never thought my girls needed to be perfect, but I've thought the boys who they may date should be. Now that I'll have a boy, I realize what a double standard that was to place on the opposite sex. We're all human. Very different, but more alike than anything else.

21) On a lighter note, have I mentioned how much it sucks to bend over? As soon as baby is out, I will be picking things up off the floor with a smile just because I'll appreciate being able to do it with ease. Nowadays, I just stare longingly at the floor after I drop something knowing it's a long ways down. I'm currently trying to perfect the toe grab.

22) It's crazy to think that next Christmas we'll have another child in front of the tree, an 8 month old no less. Though tempting, we resisted buying him anything this year, so 2017 might get a lil crazy.

23) Opening a box of boy clothes Granny Janny bought made it seem that much realer. Everything down to our dryer lint has been pink for 6 plus years, so this is so surreal. I will wait until he's 37 ish weeks to want him here, but I am very anxious to meet the other man responsible for this bump ;)

24) We're hoping to decide on a name sooner than later. Because Faith and Gabby's names both have 5 letters, I was kind of hoping to do another 5 letter name that starts with an E, but those are pretty slim pickens. Now only if Rob and I can agree before April 25th. No, we will not be naming him Dak, Ezekial, or any other Cowboy football player name.

25) The rest of the story is unwritten right now, but I am happier than ever to cherish and celebrate the rest of the milestones along the way this being the last go round. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to the little boy kicking me. Your goofy family loves you already.